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Tuesday, 3 June 2008

the days are getting shorter

It's June now. I've just spent the last day of my work last Saturday, the end of last month. Technically, i am free from any bond or contract. In other words, now i'm part of the unemployed community. Yay!

True that i've been looking forward for this day to come. Ever since work becomes boring, and the one hour travel to and another fro becomes increasingly a waste of time. There wasn't much that was entrusted to me at work, partly 'cause i'm only working there temporarily. Ended up staring at the monitor screen in front of me, wondering what else i could do, day in day out.

Thankfully i was able to access the internet at work, which is ironically, where i spent half of my time at work. Occasionally finding some poor victims on MSN to disturb - mostly Huilin, Jem and Yew Wen (haha).

I had thought i would miss the work, or my (ex)colleagues, or the lonely travel even. Funnily enough, sitting here in front of my laptop having all the time in the world to myself (for the next month, at least), i seriously don't. I'd much prefer to be bumming than working, anytime. Haha i can be such a lazy sod if i wanted to.

There's one thing i miss though. The very core of my survival of those 3-months of intense sleep-inducing boredom. That which sits where i can always find it in times of need.

The Magical Tin of Milo of the Pantry!

It has been the one i look forward to seeing everyday. The moment it's emptied of its content of Milo, it'll always magically(!) fill itself up overnight. Man, i need to get my hands on one of those. Haha. I think i'm suffering from Milo withdrawal syndrome now =/

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On a more serious note, reaching the end of my working period does hit me hard. It's like one of those to-do-before-i-leave stuff, and most of the list is already crossed out now that it scares me. That before long, i'll be ready to head to those unfamiliar lands.

Ready. I don't think i'll ever be ready to leave. There is too much at stake, and i'm very, very happy status quo. Why can't life remain its familiar self to me. Sigh.

As i woke up today, my mind was replaying the scene when my older brother crossed the checkpoint and left on his plane to Melbourne. I remember me, my younger brother, parents, and our relatives sending him off. As we lost sight of him past the checkpoint, we went to the viewing gallery and watch as his tram took him to the departure area.

Next year, my brother would have graduated. Then it will be my turn to be on the plane. In my mind i saw myself, carrying a big backpack, luggage in stow, walking towards the departure gate. I felt sad.

a look on life (ii)
16 July 2007

It seems almost surreal my turn is coming. I'm already feeling sad.

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