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Thursday, 13 April 2006

9th April

Last Sunday was my birthday. I've hit the next decade of my life. The big 2-0.

I wonder.. what are birthdays for? We don't like, change overnight when our birthday passed. We don't turn one year older when our birthday passed. We just turned one day older.

Maybe birthdays are there to remind us we ARE getting older? Sigh.

This birthday, i looked back on my life like i've never done before. Funny how much i'd changed before i even realise it. How much i had grown up.

With each passing birthday, memories of my childhood seem more like another life altogether. Distant, yet comfortingly familiar. I'm not someone who lives in the past, but as i get older, the past becomes the only constant thing in my life. And yet even that is all but a blur of fleeting impressions of a once-upon-a-time..

And with each passing birthday, i wonder if this is what i wanted in my life. If i'm living the life i want, doing the things i like. I never used to care bout the future, not even my education. Going into Taylor's to do A-Levels is purely decided upon coz most of my friends were going there, and my bro did A-Levels there too. Getting into IMU studying medicine is solely based on the fact that i didn't have many choices to begin with. And i made the decision to study medicine in a single day.

I admit i was someone who only knows how to live in the present. I didn't care what happened in the past. I didn't know how to plan my future.

Maybe that's how i protected myself, being in denial that i need to have some control of my life. Ignorance is bliss, they say. I say ignorance is just a stupid excuse.

Maybe this will be the turning point in my life. The time i decided to take hold of myself and determine how my future gonna be.

Birthdays are there to tell you had lived another year.
Birthdays are there as an excuse for celebrating.
Birthdays are there to remind your friends of you.
Birthdays are there to remind you of yourself.

My 20th birthday. Happy Birthday to me.

I just got bigger =D

shamelessly copied from Yih Seong's blog
have to credit Pwassy for that cute birthday phrase haha =P

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